I know not all fears can’t be controlled because we literally have our own built in automatic response team (Fight or flight), for when our body feels we need to kick into survival mode. Our fears are caused by either our logical/illogical thoughts. So, when you’re in a situation where you think “I can possibly be seriously injured or even killed”, that is a logical fear. Now your logical reaction would be that your body - sometimes without even thinking - seeks what it needs to do in order to survive.
On the other hand, you have fears in which you inflict upon yourself, so when I say “Do not feed into fear” I mean: Do not give fear the satisfaction it wants and needs to keep thriving off you, ya feel me? I’m talking ALL the negative self-talk, self-judgement, self-harm, allowing guilt and shame to take over is feeding into your fear.
Think about it honey, if your automatic response when that fear arises is to shut down and begin judging yourself, talking down on yourself, harming yourself then fear itself is winning. At that point you are over-indulging it instead of starving it.
I am speaking ever so broadly on fears because your fears come in all different forms. Whether your dealing with trauma, anxiety, depression, lack of self-confidence, lack of self-love and the list unfortunately goes on further than you can think. Just please know that it does get better if YOU are willing to bring those fears into the light.
Talk about them, even if you have to write down all your fears to make them known because a lot of the time we hide stuff from ourselves that we have to take time to uncover. If you’re not quite comfortable yet talking to a therapist or close friend/family about what you’re going through, do what I did - talk to your damn self like actually open your mouth and talk. Tell yourself how certain things make you feel and be honest, don’t try and lie your way through healing - you’re gonna end up hurt hurt, you’ve been warned my friend :)
I’m not here to tell you you’ll overcome your fear in a therapy session or with a two hour enlightened talk with yourself in the mirror but what I am saying is that since you chose to bring your fear out of the dark, it will get better but just like everything else in this life its going to take effort. You’re going to need to practice better self-care, self-love, healthy boundaries, acknowledge your triggers and a LOT of positive self-talk. I know it’s easy to talk shit about ourselves even as a joke but be very careful, your subconscious doesn’t always know the difference.
